You are not connected. Please login or register

Mazey Flyff » General » Introductions & Goodbye » asasim lost & don't know what to do

im lost & don't know what to do

avatar

lenalee

Sr. Member
Posts : 458
Points : 994
Likes Received : 2
Join date : 2013-08-13
lenalee
  
ey there everyone , i've lost my uncle  ( today) the last person , the last member of my family who i had left . I'm lost & depresd im glad i had a chance to know all of you , i wish the best for everyone . I will take 1-2 days off Sad, because  i cant stand it anymore  ;[ . Theres a chance if i don't come back in one week i couldn't take the pain anymore & i ended up by dying , also then you can remove me from the staff members Sad . It's a honor to be here with you guy's i love you all Sad..

##1 - Posted on Mon Sep 30, 2013 9:57 am
View user profile https://www.facebook.com/szasz.lenalee
avatar

Grace

Member
Posts : 63
Points : 73
Likes Received : 0
Join date : 2013-09-22
Grace
  
I'm really sorry to hear of your loss Crying or Very sad My thoughts and Prayers are with you & Your family~Be strong love  
Best wishes~~<3


##2 - Posted on Mon Sep 30, 2013 2:33 pm
View user profile
avatar

Grey

Administrator
Administrator
Posts : 1207
Points : -2147483547
Likes Received : 69
Join date : 2013-07-13
Jigglypuff  Psyduck 
Grey
  
I would like to express my sincere condolences. I know it's the hardest part to losing a member of the family, hope that you continue fighting no matter what. Always think that where ever he was now, he's already happy, fine and not feeling anymore pain.

Looking forward to see you soon. Take time as much as you need, we are waiting for you to come back.

##3 - Posted on Mon Sep 30, 2013 4:46 pm

______________________________________________________________________________________________________
View user profile
avatar

lenalee

Sr. Member
Posts : 458
Points : 994
Likes Received : 2
Join date : 2013-08-13
lenalee
  
im happy with you guy's & i really thank you for the support means alot Sad & grace my uncle was my last family i don't got nobody else anymore im alone =( ( mom died when i was born , dad died 2 Sad i don't know if i got cousens but my uncle never mentioned them ) i used to live with him & he was who cheered me up all the time :< . I don't know what to do all i know is life don't stop .

##4 - Posted on Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:21 pm
View user profile https://www.facebook.com/szasz.lenalee
avatar

Ryan

Newbie
Posts : 9
Points : 24
Likes Received : 0
Join date : 2013-09-23
Ryan
  
I Feel Sorry For You Lena..I Hope You Be Strong and Don't Lose Hope...And We All Waiting For Your Return Smile

##5 - Posted on Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:54 pm
View user profile
avatar

Lopa

Ex-GM
Posts : 42
Points : 107
Likes Received : 4
Join date : 2013-06-18
Lopa
  
Before you make any rash decisions on ending your life, Lena, I want you to do me a favor: Download & install Skype if you don't have it already, and add the user "rikki.brikk" to your contacts. I don't want you to feel alone anymore, because I know how it feels, and I desperately want to save you from that hell. I may not know you very well, but that doesn't change that I care. No one should have to be alone, and certainly not such a sweet person like you. Add me on Skype, and talk to me any time you want to, provided I'm online of course. Right now I'm at school, and I can't get on Skype, but I will be on when I get home in about 8 hours or so.

Please don't leave us, Lena, we all love you, and we'd hate to see you go. There needs to be more nice people like you in this world, and if you leave, then we lose one. That's not something I personally can deal with. You are not alone, not anymore. You have Mazey-FlyFF. We're all here for you, please don't forget that, sweetheart.

~Love, Lopa.

##6 - Posted on Tue Oct 01, 2013 2:50 am
View user profile
avatar

McStar

Sr. Member
Posts : 223
Points : 479
Likes Received : 0
Join date : 2013-10-01
McStar
  
Lena, I just came to mazey and I've been reading many threads and stuff, And truthfully I came to like you a lot.  Your speech, sweetness and cuteness of your posts.

I'm sure if you leave us we will face a great loss as well. You don't have to be alone, We are here for you ^^ ! And I'm very sorry for your loss, losing the last member of your family must be very harsh.

Just be strong and look, From what it looks like Lopa seems to be like your own brother/sister ! [Sorry lopsie I don't know your gender]. So Be happy ! Take as long as you need Smile Come back cheerful as Lena can ever be !

##7 - Posted on Tue Oct 01, 2013 4:52 am
View user profile http://www.i-dont-have-a-website.com
avatar

dhiderate

Member
Posts : 169
Points : 765
Likes Received : 0
Join date : 2013-07-22
dhiderate
  
i feel sorry for your loss.
Let me share you something lee,
When i was still @ highschool im quite a loner not because im not social but because my class always treats me with competition, i can see trough their action and ended up reading what they are up to that i was called "abnormal" and b4 i know it i never got to get any true friends, i experienced many depressing moments and most of them are betrayal and bullies including whenever i go out to school i encounter some bullies that i almost got a bruise every night when i go home.
It made me so depressed that i don't want to go to school anymore.
but don't have anyone to tell that including my parents because i don't want any kind of comotion @ school such as my parent going there so i end up getting depressed more that i skipped classes for 2 weeks(my parent doesn't know since she go to work early and come home pretty late and she thought i joined the Taekwondo/Karate Club having those bruise), of course no one bothered to contact me since i don't have friends that time, and i know that my grades will gradually drop to the point of failure.
I ended up getting frustrated over it so painful that i no longer feel anything other than agony every time i try to sleep.Whenever i woke up, my chest hurts so bad.
I became fat/obesse my weight increased to 80+kg and one day my mother noticed it. i told so many lies/excuses etc.
Even though i know that was only a temporary solution, i convinced my self every day that this pain will fade on time.
but during these 2 weeks.
One night I cannot control anymore these pain that i ended up crying on my room like a baby and had so many flashbacks from the day i get to recognize anything on these world, it was really painful.
The agony keeps on getting stronger and stronger that i tried comiting suicide every other day by trying not to breath/drowning my self(its stupid cuz i have no idea that will never kill me).
That time i stopped caring what ever happens to me, and the way i think that i was superior to others suddenly gone to inferior.
From that point i desired death what i whisper b4 i sleep "please let me die" with tears flowing.

Then theres one thing that saved me one day...
A Story, right, a story, it was the first time of me recognizing anime as a godly creation of mankind, that anime was named Tsubasa Chronicles.
At first, it really isnt the story that cought my attention, its the music.
The Orchestric music that touched my heart and b4 i know it, tears began falling down from my eyes.
How did a music touched my heart when i always hear different musics @ school specially when theres an event?
Thats what i asked myself that time.
The orchestra music that touched my heart was a composition of Yuki Kajiura and the title was The Song of Storm and Fire. The past me slowly faded and another me started to shine, i searched about these godly musics and finally ended up to download/purchasing Albums like Tutti Sounds, WAVE, Yuki Kajiura albums and more.
The pain on my chest suddenly disappeared one day and i felt that a new me was born, i became obsessed with those music that i made myself learn to play musical instruments starting from Guitar,flute to recent which is piano(self learning).

I started attending class again, the pain came back after seeing the gate, so i pulled out my earphone and listen to musics and set my mind making the schools atmosphere different from what i sense b4.
I made some friends after they learned out about me knowing how to play different musical instruments.
They thought i composed the musics i was playing, they thought those musics are strange but very soothing to the ears, and told them, those are all anime musics, some are shocked cuz some of them thinks that anime is = to porn/hentai.

It turned out pretty well, even though there are still some who hates me for some reason.
I focused on those who smiles to me and made my first best friend.
I said goodbye to my old self and wrote about what happened during those weeks detailed on a notebook and hid it.

Maybe someday, my way of thinking will change again to worse, but.
I fixed/set my mind and think, that what ever happens to me, there is always something that can save me.
It might not be human,thing, or just a passing by event. As long as i explore, i will diffinitely reach that hand of God.
So Stretch your arms and try something else, im sure that death is not the only path that u could take to stop/ease the suffering on your heart.
Im sure that your uncle doesn't want u to be sad.
So Cheer up, and explore more, if u found a hidden tallent of yours, im pretty sure you will shine.

##8 - Posted on Tue Oct 01, 2013 6:05 am
View user profile
avatar

lenalee

Sr. Member
Posts : 458
Points : 994
Likes Received : 2
Join date : 2013-08-13
lenalee
  
thank for the kindly supports & also i've added u in skype lopa , it hurts that's true im tyring to stand up but it's realy hard when im nearly up i fall again & i will talk with all of u . Also i don't plan to leave this beautiful comunity.

##9 - Posted on Tue Oct 01, 2013 8:17 pm
View user profile https://www.facebook.com/szasz.lenalee

ForGame

Jr. Member
Posts : 11
Points : 35
Likes Received : 1
Join date : 2013-10-02
ForGame
  
I'm sorry Lena I'm new here but if you feel alone you can message me/add me on skype anytime you want.We can be friends. Remember this : Nobody is alone in this world

##10 - Posted on Thu Oct 03, 2013 8:36 pm
View user profile
avatar

lenalee

Sr. Member
Posts : 458
Points : 994
Likes Received : 2
Join date : 2013-08-13
lenalee
  
im getting better slowly & i experienced i've got almost everything what i whant here friends who care about me , fun & realy enjoyable time & sure we can skype ( anime.lovers1 ) that's my skype <3

##11 - Posted on Thu Oct 03, 2013 8:39 pm
View user profile https://www.facebook.com/szasz.lenalee
avatar
Posts : 265
Points : 459
Likes Received : 6
Join date : 2013-08-19
Reymesterio
  
I'm so sorry to hear that you'll get strong soon or later and just forget about everything and if you didn't then you must forget because if you didn't forget your life is gonna be so hard and sharp so just forget everything and look into the life with a cheerful look and just let the life go on and try to search for your other family members do anything because you may still have some family members. God will never forget you ^^ just forget about the past and start a new beginning with a cheerful smile and everything will go nice. Best wishes for you and I say it again I'm so sorry to hear that and I feel really sad for you.

##12 - Posted on Sun Oct 06, 2013 2:22 pm
View user profile
avatar

lenalee

Sr. Member
Posts : 458
Points : 994
Likes Received : 2
Join date : 2013-08-13
lenalee
  
thank you Rey means alot & i started to eat , sleep & drink well again . Sometime i just cry without a reason , but i will be fine .

##13 - Posted on Sun Oct 06, 2013 7:39 pm
View user profile https://www.facebook.com/szasz.lenalee

Sponsored content

Sponsored content
  


##14 - Posted

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum